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Communication skills
“Lack of communication leaves fear and doubt.” ~Kellan Lutz Good communication can strengthen any connection. Staying in touch, sharing how we feel, and expressing interest in the lives of others can go a long way toward building solid relationships. I’m an over-communicator by nature and by trade. After college, I had jobs that required meetings and follow-up phone calls. Later, as a newspaper columnist, my career was all about talking to people in print. (Early in my marriage, an in-law told me I “talk too much.”) But after years of living among both chatterboxes and quiet people, I’m usually more comfortable with the chatterboxes. While some folks believe it’s safer…
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How will you spend today?
“Your problem is how you are going to spend this one odd and precious life you have been issued. Whether you’re going to spend it trying to look good and creating the illusion that you have power over other people and circumstances, or whether you are going to taste it, enjoy it, and find out the truth about who you are.” ~Anne Lamott Statistics show that social media abuse inhibits our creativity, triggers periods of depression, stirs feelings of inadequacy, and can fuel aggression — just for starters. We make some dubious trade-offs when our time is consumed by social media use. Not that we shouldn’t enjoy a few of…
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Look for the helpers
“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’” ~Fred Rogers As Mister Rogers reminded us, there’s always hope and healing wherever you find the helpers. Late last week, for instance, I had two minor emergencies (one more critical than the other) that sent me in search of medical help. Despite the stress of it all, I was amazed at how quickly two of my doctors were able to see me — almost immediately — when I called their offices for advice. I can’t begin to express…
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Walk a mile in someone else’s shoes?
“We are sun and moon, dear friend; we are sea and land. It is not our purpose to become each other. It is to recognize each other, to learn to see the other and honor him for what he is: each the other’s opposite and complement.” ~Hermann Hesse, Narcissus and Goldmund In popular culture, we give lip service to the importance of honoring our differences and celebrating our uniqueness. It’s a noble theme in song lyrics, novels, speeches, and essays — but how’s that really working for us? Deep down, we want others to appreciate our own special attributes. We want to be respected for our opposing points of view. (We’re…
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Complainers versus problem-solvers
“When you consistently maintain a positive frame of mind, you’ll become known as a problem-solver rather than a complainer. Mentally healthy people avoid complainers. They seek out problem-solvers.” ~ Joseph Sommerville, PhD, The Five Keys to Interpersonal Success Are you a complainer or a problem-solver? According to behavioral research, if you spend a significant amount of time with complainers and doomsayers, you’re probably sporting a negative attitude, too. When complaining becomes the norm — at home, in the workplace, or in social circles — it’s hard to break the pattern. Negativity is as contagious as it is demoralizing. As renowned psychologist Susan Albers puts it, complaining is like a virus. It…
