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You be you
“Forget popularity; focus on sincerity. Do what you do, not for applause, but because it is what is right for you. Practice respecting yourself and becoming a reliable part of your own support system.” ~Angel Chernoff, Marc and Angel Hack Life The word “popularity” still sends me back down Memory Lane to junior high school. And today’s quote from Marc and Angel got me thinking about the difference between sincerity and popularity. When we focus on being popular, we value the number of friends we have rather than the quality of their character, or their compatibility. Likewise, when we try to stay “on trend” with our creative projects, we risk lowering the quality…
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Complainers versus problem-solvers
“When you consistently maintain a positive frame of mind, you’ll become known as a problem-solver rather than a complainer. Mentally healthy people avoid complainers. They seek out problem-solvers.” ~ Joseph Sommerville, PhD, The Five Keys to Interpersonal Success Are you a complainer or a problem-solver? According to behavioral research, if you spend a significant amount of time with complainers and doomsayers, you’re probably sporting a negative attitude, too. When complaining becomes the norm — at home, in the workplace, or in social circles — it’s hard to break the pattern. Negativity is as contagious as it is demoralizing. As renowned psychologist Susan Albers puts it, complaining is like a virus. It…
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Deep listening
“How often do you offer your undivided attention to others? Do you inquire into how they’re doing, what’s happening in their world, or what they need to feel safe and happy? Or are you quick to talk about yourself and see how others might serve you?” ~John Amodeo, PhD One of the hallmarks of a great conversationalist is the ability to listen. Ideally, when someone asks what you’ve been up to lately, you hope they’ll pay attention to your answer and ask follow-up questions. Too often lately, most people seem eager to shut you up, derail your topic, and reroute the conversation back to themselves. How often have you walked…
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Expectations
It’s never a bad idea to hold ourselves and others to higher standards. Striving for “the best” is a worthy goal. But extremely high (or unrealistic) expectations are sometimes followed by disappointment. One small example: How many times have you dined at a trendy new restaurant, only to end up disappointed when your meals fell short of the rave reviews you’d read? At the same time, if you expect more from other folks than they’re able to give, you’re bound to feel letdown at some point. Or, as Anne Lamott put it, “Expectations are resentments waiting to happen.” Sometimes what we want isn’t directly in line with what is available…
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What is integrity?
“Integrity is doing the right thing, even when no one is watching.” ~C.S. Lewis With so much turmoil unfolding in our country lately, I’ve been thinking about the word integrity. Growing up, I was taught to believe that integrity was an essential quality to expect in leaders of business and government. Integrity was also something to consider (without compromise) when choosing my friends and life partner. So what does integrity really mean? Here’s how Merriam-Webster defines it: 1 : firm adherence to a code of especially moral or artistic values : incorruptibility. 2 : an unimpaired condition : soundness. 3 : the quality or state of being complete or undivided : completeness.…
