Personal growth
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How to Know a Person
“Being open-hearted is a prerequisite for being a full, kind, and wise human being. But it is not enough. People need social skills.” ~David Brooks As author David Brooks sees it, so much of our current national angst results from the “fraying of our social fabric.” Put simply, we’ve forgotten how to talk with each other. We’ve forgotten how to listen to each other. At the same time, too many of us feel unseen and misunderstood. Worse yet, mental health statistics show that we’re feeling lonelier than ever. Social media may have given us more connections — and nearly unlimited access to others — but the quality of those relationships…
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Still looking through an old lens?
“If you don’t allow yourself to learn and grow from the experience — from what was said, done, and felt — you will always look at your life through the same old lens.” ~Marc and Angel Chernoff, Marc & Angel Hack Life Sometimes we keep repeating the same mistakes while expecting different results. Or maybe we’re sinking so deeply in a rut that we can’t figure out why old patterns of behavior and outdated opinions or preferences aren’t working for us anymore. We like to think we’re “loyal” or consistent, but sometimes we’re just … stubborn. This can apply to everything from redecorating the kitchen to mending relationships. The older…
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Luminosity
“Look carefully around you and recognize the luminosity of souls. Sit beside those who draw you to that.” ~Rumi Other people’s moods — and viewpoints — are contagious. In fact, there’s a clinical study suggesting that we become like the five people with whom we spend most of our time. (This might explain why so many married couples and lifelong best friends actually resemble each other.) According to this theory, if your spouse and peer group are serial pessimists and complainers, you might be one too. It’s also likely that you share the same political views. Psychological studies aside, I’m always drawn to folks who spread their sunshine and draw…
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The joys of reading
“The best moments in reading are when you come across something – a thought, a feeling, a way of looking at things – which you had thought special and particular to you. Now here it is, set down by someone else, a person you have never met, someone even who is long dead. And it is as if a hand has come out and taken yours.” ~Alan Bennett, The History Boys I’m a lucky reader with an active book club in my own neighborhood. Once a month, I get to walk down the street or around the corner to a friend’s home to discuss a novel or memoir that I might…
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Sincerity
“Sincerity is an openness of heart. We find it in very few people. What we often see is only an artful pretense to win the confidence of others.” ~La Rochefoucauld, French philosopher There was a time when the phrase “I love you” was almost sacred. We saved it for rare and precious moments with lovers, spouses, our kids, and our closest friends. Today, “I love you” (or the Hollywood style, “Love you!”) is tossed around casually in text messages or shouted across parking lots and other public places — even to folks who haven’t fully earned our complete devotion. Love for humanity is a wonderful thing, and yes, sincere affection…