Health & wellbeing
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Asserting vs bullying
“The practice of assertiveness: being authentic in our dealings with others; treating people with respect in social contexts; refusing to fake the reality of who we are or what we esteem in order to avoid disapproval; the willingness to stand up for ourselves and our ideas in appropriate ways, in appropriate contexts.” ~ Nathaniel Branden, psychologist While most of us understand the concept, “assertiveness” isn’t always easy to practice. For some of us, being assertive can feel uncomfortable — even when it means standing up for ourselves or asking for what we deserve. On the other hand, sometimes we allow others to bully us or take advantage of our generosity.…
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Surf’s up
“While you are riding the wave, just put your best self out there and enjoy it.” ~Frieda Pinto My son has told me that I tend to “overthink” things. I like to believe this trait is part of being a writer — but I’ll admit that focusing on what could possibly go wrong can be a tiresome habit in daily life. Even when there’s nothing to worry about, I don’t always trust my good fortune or my good luck. I wait for the other metaphorical shoe to drop. Psychologists call it “anticipatory anxiety.” Today’s quote is a perfect reminder for over-thinkers like me. When life is going well, the smartest…
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Believe in yourself
“What you believe yourself to be, you are.” ~Claude M. Bristol, The Magic of Believing World War I veteran Claude Bristol (1891-1951) was a pioneer of the positive thinking movement. He wrote The Magic of Believing to help his fellow veterans adapt to civilian life — yet it also resonated with others who struggled to overcome trauma, self-limiting patterns, or negative attitudes. Bristol was convinced that success in any realm depends on dedication, belief, and character. His philosophy explains how some people triumph over adversity while others remain stuck. In essence, Bristol’s “magic” was about unleashing the power of the subconscious mind. You are what you believe. You achieve what…
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Here and now
“I have lived large parts of my life in wonderful circumstances that I utterly failed to appreciate. Reasons to be happy were everywhere, but somehow I didn’t connect with them. It was as though I was eating but couldn’t taste the food. Finally, I’ve learned to celebrate the good while it’s happening.” ~Marianne Williamson The weather in northern Michigan was chilly and unpredictable while Doug and I were there last week. And just as we’ve learned to expect when we’re visiting off season in Glen Arbor, many of our favorite shops and restaurants were closed. Still, there’s something both restful and beautiful in the loneliness of our state’s northern landscape…
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Out of balance
“To be in any sort of relationship where you don’t express yourself, simply to keep the peace, is a relationship ruled by one person. It will never be balanced or healthy.” ~Bronnie Ware, The Top Five Regrets of the Dying Last week, I ran into someone who has a gift for making me feel both uneasy and insignificant. A sensitive subject came up, and this person — who chattered nonstop — had no interest in hearing my point of view or any of my suggestions. Not surprisingly, I couldn’t wait to escape. Reciprocity is a huge component of healthy, balanced relationships. That includes listening and conversing with an open mind…