Health & wellbeing
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How to comfort a grieving friend
“If you’re my age, you’ve probably had your heart broken many times. So it’s not that difficult to unpack a bit of grief from some little corner of your heart and cry over it.” ~Emma Thompson Losing our parents and other loved ones is a reality of life as we age — a reality that’s easier to face if we have a nurturing support system. But sometimes it’s hard to know how to help and comfort friends who are grieving a new loss. That’s the topic of my newest column in The Sunday Oakland Press. You’ll find it in the Homefront section in the print edition (July 2) or you…
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Moving in another direction
“Taking a step back to walk away from situations that threaten your peace of mind, values, morals, or self-worth, is almost always a healthy and necessary step forward.” ~Marc and Angel Chernoff Growing up, we were often lectured about the importance of “sticking with it” — even when we suspected it wasn’t right for us. Of course, there’s merit in staying the course and working through difficult times and rough patches, but sometimes it’s better to slow down and reassess what’s really going on, as today’s quote reminds us. We might decide that it’s wiser moving on to something else. Loyalty to anyone or anything isn’t a virtue if it’s seriously messing…
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Group dynamics
“Find something that you are passionate about — and you’ll find a waiting kinship of people willing to unite for the cause.” ~Wes Adamson Whether you’re passionate about books, music, politics, knitting, or helping others, there’s a group of people out there who share your interest. And if you can’t find the right special-interest group to join, consider starting one yourself. Group energy is fuel for the soul — and expands your personal universe. After months of pandemic isolation, most of us got used to spending time alone or in small family bubbles. And while a family is a group with guaranteed membership, psychologists agree that spending quality time with friends…
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Throwback Thursday: “Anatomy of a Skin Cancer Scar”
“Scars….can be a little ugly on the outside, but scars show that you’re a survivor, that you made it through something, and not only did you make it through, but now you’re stronger and wiser and more educated because of that tough time that you went through.” ~Kyle Carpenter Unprotected sunbathing was a common indiscretion for many teenagers when I was growing up. Going for the burn, we’d spend endless summer days on the beach, usually slathered in baby oil. It rarely occurred to us that we’d pay a high price someday. We didn’t realize that sun damage is cumulative, appearing much later in the form of sagging skin, wrinkles…
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More joy, please
“When we place our attention on joy, we become more joyful. The world seems more benevolent.” ~Martha Beck When I focus on the horror stories in the news — such as daily mass shootings — I catch myself feeling angry, hopeless, fearful or depressed. I start to wonder if I’m a moving target on a giant shooting range. But the worst part, really, is that I lose sight of all the goodness that still exists or occurs around me. At lunch yesterday afternoon, a couple of friends shared recent experiences that involved the kindness and generosity of some lovely people they know. Happy stories. As they recounted these experiences, their…
