Friendship and relationship advice
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Are you really listening?
“It is the province of knowledge to speak, and it is the privilege of wisdom to listen.” ~Oliver Wendell Holmes, Sr. Some folks are always thinking about what they want to say next — and not really listening to others. I notice this often on talks shows and discussion panels, and I’ve experienced it myself in daily conversations. Listening is an unsung, unspoken skill — and we can learn from those who do it well. Attentive listeners silence their own egos. They don’t try to hijack or dominate a conversation, and they don’t try to “top” anything you’ve just said. They ask thoughtful follow-up questions after you’ve had your say,…
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Putting yourself last?
“Sometimes you have to put your own needs first, even if that doesn’t please others. You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.” ~Shannon Olson When I was younger, I often placed the wants and wishes of others before my own — even in matters as simple as choosing where to go out for dinner. Like other women I knew, I allowed myself to remain stuck in second place. Everyone else, it seemed, had greater needs, better ideas, or bigger problems to solve than I had. Even if someone gave me “permission” to put myself first, I felt guilty when I did so. Thankfully,…
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Enough to share
“Love is something that if you give it away, you end up having more.” ~Malvina Reynolds For years I’ve been fascinated by the “law of abundance,” which some might dismiss as one of those woo-woo New Age theories. I think there’s something to it. In a nutshell, the abundance theory suggests that if you live generously, acting on the belief that there’s always plenty to share, you’ll attract more goodness in your life. In other words, the more you give away — whether it’s love, money, time, or produce from your garden — the more you get back. Conversely, if you’re stingy or overly protective of your own resources, you’re…
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The future of incivility
“If you do not have control over your mouth, you will not have control over your future.” ~Germany Kent Some folks feel entitled to speak their minds without regard for the feelings of others. When they hurt or offend someone, they’re more likely to defend themselves rather than apologize. Or they might accuse others of being too sensitive. In any event, words have consequences. For starters, rude or callous remarks reflect badly on the speaker’s character. As today’s quote suggests, it’s best to think before you speak. Insensitive comments, personal or political, will come back to haunt you later. ~CL
- Friendship and relationship advice, Greenfield Village and Henry Ford Musuem, Health & wellbeing, Spirituality
It’s all so complicated …
“Life is actually quite simple, but we insist on making it complicated.” ~Confucius Human beings have a knack for crafting lives of infinite complexity. For starters, we shame ourselves if we’re not always busy or productive, yet we expect everyone else to be available on demand. We overburden our schedules with more commitments than we can easily manage. Then we spend hours chatting on the phone or responding to followers on social media — and wonder why we don’t have a spare moment to meet real friends for coffee. This summer, why not aim for simplicity in every aspect of our lives, from household chores to social connections? Isn’t it…
