Communication
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How wired are you ?
“When I grow up, I’m gonna look up from my phone and see my life.” ~Phoebe Bridgers Have you been feeling lonely lately? Ironically, a growing body of research shows that being more connected online is making us lonelier — and eroding our mental health. The American Medical Association, for instance, examined several new studies on “the internet and psychological well-being.” Overall, increased internet use was associated with “a decline in users’ communication with family members, a decrease in their social circle, and an increase in depression and loneliness.” Socializing online also makes us lazier. We delude ourselves into believing that we’ve spent time with others — when we’ve only…
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Words and feelings
“People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” ~Maya Angelou As the old adage goes, it’s not just what we say that matters — but how we say it. While preparing for an essay workshop I coached last month, I ran across some notes I’d made about the importance of “voice and tone” in our writing. Since most personal essays are conversational, our job as writers is to draw readers into the heart and soul of our stories. We want others to relate to our experiences; we don’t want to alienate them. The same is true…
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Who really said that?
“Great minds discuss ideas; average minds discuss events; small minds discuss people.” – Henry Thomas Buckle (1821 – 1862), English historian Not unlike gossip, many of the popular quotations we can easily pull from the Internet are misattributed or taken out of context. It’s worth doing some research to determine the origin and authenticity of the material. The more we spread misinformation, the harder it is to pinpoint the truth, the real source. Just like gossip. Today’s quote is often attributed to Eleanor Roosevelt. But apparently scholars can’t find anything close to it in any of Roosevelt’s writings or speeches. According to an in-depth piece in the Quote Investigator, the…
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Undersharing
“Our stories are not meant for everyone. Hearing them is a privilege, and we should always ask ourselves this before we share: ‘Who has earned the right to hear my story?’ Even if we have just one or two people in our lives who can sit with us and hold space for our stories, and love us for our strengths and struggles, we are incredibly lucky.” ~Brené Brown There are times when I face challenges that I’m not comfortable sharing with many others. As tempting as it can be to seek out other opinions, or even emotional comfort, I first need to get a handle on those issues myself. Back in…
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How to Know a Person
“Being open-hearted is a prerequisite for being a full, kind, and wise human being. But it is not enough. People need social skills.” ~David Brooks As author David Brooks sees it, so much of our current national angst results from the “fraying of our social fabric.” Put simply, we’ve forgotten how to talk with each other. We’ve forgotten how to listen to each other. At the same time, too many of us feel unseen and misunderstood. Worse yet, mental health statistics show that we’re feeling lonelier than ever. Social media may have given us more connections — and nearly unlimited access to others — but the quality of those relationships…
