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How we grow
“I think the place we grow in terms of self-efficacy and internal power is not when we are always happy, but when we’re doing emotionally painful things with courage and integrity.” ~Martha Beck Someone I know has been struggling with major depression for a while. Though I’d often wondered about her unpredictable moods, I didn’t realize the full extent of her pain until she shared her diagnosis recently. As she talked about moving past her emotional struggles and daily obstacles, I admired her courage and gained a greater understanding of her rocky journey toward wellness. As Martha Beck reminds us today, we do most of our growing when we’re pushing through…
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Funny Friday: How to write a book
“I’m writing a book. I’ve got the page numbers done.” ~ Steven Wright I’m starting to work on a new essay collection this fall, so today’s quote hit home while it made me laugh. Too often, procrastination throws me off schedule. If I don’t set a real deadline, I’ll find dozens of other things to distract myself. How about you? What motivates you to start and complete a project? ~CL
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Stop the insults
“Dismiss whatever insults your own soul.” ~Walt Whitman Today’s advice from Walt Whitman got me thinking about things that “insult my soul” and make me cringe. Topping my list are filthy bathrooms in restaurants — right up there with certain vulgar and obnoxious political candidates. There are dozens of other odious behaviors that some of us cling to, or tolerate, even when they’re long past their expiration dates. Maybe we practice habits that harm our health. Maybe we allow people to disrespect us, or take us for granted — just because that’s the way they always roll. Maybe we keep ruminating on old emotional pain or anger. Maybe we keep…
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Changing with the seasons
“Every time you are tempted to react in the same old way, ask if you want to be a prisoner of the past or a pioneer of the future. The past is closed and limited; the future is open and free.” ~Deepak Chopra Most of us prefer to stay with what’s comfortable or familiar, even when we know there’s something better out there. Change demands courage — but if we’re fearful, we usually try to avoid it. This applies to everything from trying a different entree on a menu to breaking an unhealthy habit like chronic complaining. We shortchange ourselves when we’re resistant to change, or, as Einstein put it,…
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Putting yourself last?
“Sometimes you have to put your own needs first, even if that doesn’t please others. You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm.” ~Shannon Olson When I was younger, I often placed the wants and wishes of others before my own — even in matters as simple as choosing where to go out for dinner. Like other women I knew, I allowed myself to remain stuck in second place. Everyone else, it seemed, had greater needs, better ideas, or bigger problems to solve than I had. Even if someone gave me “permission” to put myself first, I felt guilty when I did so. Thankfully,…
