Being vulnerable

“I spent a lot of years trying to outrun or outsmart vulnerability by making things certain and definite, black and white, good and bad. My inability to lean into the discomfort of vulnerability limited the fullness of those important experiences that are also wrought with uncertainty: Love, belonging, trust, joy, and creativity to name a few.” ~Brene Brown

For a while there, Doug and I were feeling smug (or invincible) because we’d dodged the COVID-19 bullet for so long. We got our vaccines, avoided unnecessary risks, and wore masks when necessary. Our close friends and family members have been careful, too, although many of them caught the damned virus anyway.

And so did we, finally. Doug got it last week; I tested positive yesterday. As it happens, I’ve been recovering from a previous respiratory infection — which hit me hard — so I’m especially vulnerable now. Knock on wood, my COVID-19 symptoms are relatively mild so far, thanks to the vaccines I’ve had.

As sociologist Brene Brown reminds us, to be vulnerable means to be fully human. Whether we’re trying to guard against personal rejection, traffic accidents, uncertainty, or illness, we’re still vulnerable. We’re not always in control. We can follow every precaution and build barricades to deter the “invaders,” but sometimes we get knocked down by the thing we’re running from and must learn what we can from it.

Speaking of Brene Brown, I’m a longtime fan of her work and highly recommend her inspiring Netflix special, “The Call to Courage.” ~CL