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Take your time
“Never be in a hurry. Do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset.” ~Saint Francis de Sales When I was younger, I wrote several newspaper articles per week. While working from home, I also shopped for groceries, drove the carpool, conducted phone interviews, processed the laundry, played with my son after school, and cooked family meals. I don’t know where I found the energy to do so much — but I was always under stress and in a rush. Those years flew past like geese heading south to escape winter’s chill, and I wish I…
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How to manage holiday grief and loss
“The holiest of all holidays are those kept by ourselves in silence and apart; the secret anniversaries of the heart.” ~ Henry Wadsworth Longfellow If you’re grieving a loss, holiday festivities can feel especially painful and alienating. Last year I wrote a column on managing grief and loss during the holidays for The Sunday Oakland Press. For those who don’t subscribe to the newspaper and can’t open the article links, I’m reposting the column below. EMPTY CHAIRS AT CHRISTMAS, by Cindy La Ferle for The Oakland Press My mother died three months before Christmas eight years ago. Since my father had passed several years earlier, my first Christmas season without Mom…
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Keep your light
This, my dear, is the greatest challengeto being alive.To witness injustice in the world and not allow it to consume our light.” ~Thich Nhat Hanh There’s no way around it but through it. Unless you’re in denial, it’s been a difficult week for everyone. The ongoing post-election analysis isn’t helping nearly half of our wounded country, nor is it mending the broken personal relationships that were damaged by years of nefarious, name-calling politics. As a good friend put it, “Things aren’t going to feel normal for a long time.” But we can’t let fear or despair “consume our light,” as today’s quote suggests. All week, I’ve been talking with loved…
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Life without Facebook
“The biggest problem is that Facebook and Google are these giant feedback loops that give people what they want to hear. And when you use them in a world where your biases are constantly confirmed, you become susceptible to fake news, propaganda, and demagoguery.” ~ Franklin Foer This year I’m celebrating eight years of Facebook sobriety. Once I quit, my emotional wellbeing, social life, family relationships, and productivity all improved. I started reading more, writing more, and enjoying the simple pleasures I had overlooked while I was scrolling for social media updates. Though I wrote this Oakland Press column a couple of years ago, its message still applies today —…
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Get out and vote!
“Every election is determined by the people who show up.” ~Larry Sabato, political scientist Tomorrow is a critical, history making Election Day. There’s a palpable sense of anxiety hovering like a thundercloud over everything. So much is at stake. These are stormy times, and ours is a volatile, divided nation. Political attack ads on TV are uglier than the back end of a baboon, and for that reason alone, some of us will be relieved when it’s over. That said, I’m always shocked and disappointed when I learn that many people haven’t voted yet — and don’t even plan to — including a couple of my relatives. Whether they’re uninformed,…
